The Waiting Game.

Kelley Technologies, Inc. The Banishment Program. Banishment. Banesuit. Being Bane. Eudeamon? There are many reasons one might want to partake in all of this madness... willingly. I imagine mine is not like many others, though I also imagine it could be. We'll see. But I have no Mistress, no Master commanding me to do this, safe for myself. I have no spiritual journey of self exploration I wish to jumpstart. I have no drama, that I crave a forced break from. I am not a latex fetishist dying to try the latest kink. I am not looking to do what everyone else is finding so painfully pleasant. I have broken no laws and seek the non-celled way out. I am not crazy. I am however, a leader, a lover, a social butterfly, a woman, a Mistress, a sister, a friend, a Goddess, a teacher, a free spirit, and a human being.

I am not Bane...

I don't even really want this, but I am doing it willingly for my own reasons. In a sense, volunteering myself against my own will.

Still... without craving that which plagues most others I see... I find myself waiting with a strange anxiousness to begin this experience. A sick curiosity. I know I will hate it. I know I will be bored to tears. I know I will miss my life. I know I will look at what I could be having... doing... experiencing with a sad longing. I know I will want out, the minute I am in... Still... I am anxious.

I'm going in with an open mind... I'm not ruling out any reactions or feeling I may get... but I am not expecting them.

I have my reasons... and maybe one day will share them.

I know I won't like this...

I don't think I'm going to like this....

I'm anxious...